Anonymity

He came back before the Morning Prayer. The martyr’s body was on his shoulder. Fatigue was clear in his face. In the morning, he got a letter to go on leave. Then we left with the martyr’s body. Ibrahim was tired and happy. He said, “A month ago we carried out an operation on the Bazi Deraz altitudes. Just this one martyr had been left behind. Now after calmness has returned to the region, God helped and we were able to bring him.” The news had reached to Tehran very quickly. Everyone was waiting for the martyr’s body. The next day a magnificent funeral procession was held starting from Khorasan Square. We wanted to stay in Tehran for a few days; but, we received the news that another operation was starting. We arranged to start out from the Mosque the next night.We stood in front of the Mosque with Ibrahim and a few other friends. The prayer had finished. We were talking and laughing. An old man came forward. I knew him. He was the martyr’s father. He was the father of the boy whom Ibrahim had brought his body back from the altitudes. We said hello and he responded.Everyone was silent. He was a stranger to our young group. It seemed that he wanted to say something, but … After a few seconds he broke his silence and said, “Mr. Ibrahim, thank you. You went to a lot of trouble. But my son …!” The old man paused briefly, and then he said, “My son is upset with you!!” The smile left Ibrahim’s ever-smiling face. His eyes were round in surprise. But why?! The old man had a lump in his throat. His eyes were wet with tears. His voice was shaky and tired. He said, “Last night I saw my son in my dreams. He told me, ‘During the time that we were fallen on the ground of the front and anonymous, the mother of the children of the Prophet (s), Hazrat Zahra (s), visited us every night. But now she doesn’t come anymore!’ My son told me, ‘The anonymous martyrs are the special guests of Hazrat Seddiqeh (Fatimah Zahra) (s)!’” The old man didn’t continue. Everyone was silent. I looked at Ibrahim. Large tears were dropping from the corners of his eyes and flowing down. I could read his mind. He had found what he was missing; “Anonymity!” After this event, Ibrahim’s outlook to the war and the martyrs changed. He said, “I have no more doubt that the martyrs of our war are like the companions of the Prophet (s) and the Commander of the Faithful (Imam Ali) (a). Their position is very high before God.” I heard him say many times, “If anyone wished to be with Imam Husayn (a) in Karbala, now is the time to be tested.” Ibrahim was sure that the 8-year Holy Defense was a place for reaching to the goal, to bliss, and to human perfection. That is why he spoke of the martyrs wherever he went. He talked about the forces and the war soldiers. His ethics and behavior were changing day by day, and he was becoming more spiritual. In the Andarzgu Headquarters, he would usually sleep the first two or three hours of the night, and then he would go out! He would come back at praying time and wake up the forces for the Morning Prayer. I told myself, “It has been a while that Ibrahim doesn’t stay here at nights!?” One night I followed him. I saw that he went to the kitchen of the Army Headquarters to sleep. The next day I asked some questions from an old man who was working in the kitchen. I found out that the workers in the kitchen all prayed the Midnight Prayer. That was why Ibrahim went there. If he prayed the Midnight Prayer in the Headquarters, everyone would find out. Towards the end, Ibrahim’s movements and behavior reminded me of the tradition of Imam Ali (a) when he told Nuf Bokali, “My Shi’a (followers) are people who are worshipers at nights and (like) lions during the days.”